We’re not in Kansas anymore…
Figuring out what you want to do with your life is one of the hardest taskes in life. Trying to make a name for yourself without getting sued or arrested can be hard these days, I should know I’m an intern. But even harder than figuring out your purpose in life is bathing suit shopping.
Every girl hates that time of year when she has to come to the realization that the fur coat (so to speak) needs to come off. It’s a time of year when you suddenly hate every model in any swimsuit ad you see. You find yourself dreading watching the weather report and hoping for some magical weather god that won’t take the temperature above 70 degrees until you’re ready. Some of us stop talking to friends we’ve known for years for fear of receiving an invite to the dreaded beach. You see the girls who are way too tan for it to be May, people wearing two pieces that should be wearing one pieces, and the guys that think the beach is a place for professional football.
Besides already being self-conscious about yourself, some of us can’t help but wonder if we chose the right bathing suit for the summer. You have the traditional one piece that is always safe but sometimes not very flattering; the perfect sexy one piece that only one girl on the beach is ever wearing (and you hate her for that); the modest two piece that is acceptable to wear while meeting any future mother or father-in-laws; the more revealing two piece boy short, hip hugger, low-rise, high-rise, string laiden, eye catching bikini that is sure to get a number and an invite to dinner; and the infamous thong bikini that should only be worn in non-English speaking countries.
Personally I choose the more revealing two piece that is sure to get a cell number and a free dinner (hey, a girl’s gotta eat). The choice is up to you ladies but just remember that it’s past Memorial Day A.K.A. you have less than 2 weeks to get your winter butts into sexy bikini body shape. Enjoy the treadmill (oh and grab a tube of tarte’s celufight to get the party started).
- the intern